10 lessons I learned on the journey from victim to survivor

Last month JCW Israel finished its first women’s survivors support group in Jerusalem. At the end of the group we asked the amazing participants to share their words of wisdom and advice to survivors.

Here is the second of a series essays we are sharing throughout the month.


Dearest Survivor

I know that making the decision to get help is a hard one so well done. The journey ahead of you is long and hard and sometime may feel like you want to give up so here are a few things I want you to know and always remember, especially when things get difficult

a) Honey, what happened to you is NOT you, it’s a part that is there to help you grow; you shouldn’t think that it’s who you are because it’s not.

b) Don’t listen to those who put you down please please please stick to people who will encourage you and show you love.

c) It will be ok and you’re not alone. All you have to do is ask, these people will be there; they care

d) Your story, no matter how trivial you might think it is, is not. It’s hard and you’re allowed to cry, you’re allowed to get mad you’re allowed to feel hurt! Your story is the farthest thing from trivial IT’S your story !!!!!!!

e) Celebrate your life, enjoy what you do have, so that when times are hard you can remember the good things.

f) Pray. I know that it’s hard to turn to God but talk to him and tell Him how hard it is. Get mad at Him and tell Him your pain cus I promise you even though you can’t feel it right now He’s there and listening and He cares and cries along with you honey. Even if you don’t believe in God, it’s nice to feel that there’s a higher power watching over you and loving you.

g) Try to learn to trust yourself and your instincts.

h) Be kind to yourself, focus on what you did do and not what you didn’t. If you got out of bed today- well done cuz i know how hard it is sometimes, to do even the smallest of things.

i) There are good days and bad days- if you’re having a bad day it doesn’t mean that you’re going backwards it means your brain is trying to figure things out and you’re still going forward.

j) The pain never ends but you can take control!!!!!! The pain will get easier and my hope for you is that the dark will soon turn to light.

Dearest survivor to begin your journey you must first take one step. If you already did that I tip my hat to you. Good luck on your journey, remember you are a warrior, amazing and wonderful and don’t let anything or anyone drag you down. Wishing you the best of luck always.

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