All that is left of me,
Is an empty body,
A shell of what used to be.
A canvas to pain,
A portrait I can not display.
Thoughts have no recognition.
Mind and voice a foreigner in my body.
Shattering silence sits invading my heart.
By my friends side tears I cry.
Her shoulder a rock to my limp head.
Her validating voice allowing me to speak of the perpetrator she too knows.
Tears flow in the darkened room,
My mind returns to me with thoughts,
How much more can I tell?
Risking weighing our friendship with burden I tell more,
Consequences come and our friendship is strained,
I know she cares but it hurts so bad.
Left with a spoken voice, relieved body and hurting soul,
I consider the price and worth of telling,
She backed out because of the intensity but my heart feels so light telling someone who actually knew him.
Years pass and my body fills with vibrancy.
My shell uncovering a beautiful pearl,
Becoming who I want to be.
My painful canvas on display in artistic format,
My feelings spoken, voice stronger, and heart pumping with life.
I am free.
Freedom catches up with pain,
Entangling into past and bringing me with it,
Then pain follows the freedom.
And again I am free.